Lot’s of people dread the holidays. Or, more specifically, the family functions that holidays bring. Maybe it’s because of toxic family members. Maybe it’s because of fat shaming and diet shaming. Maybe it’s all three. I’m going to share some truths with you about how to navigate all this.
IT’S OK TO SAY NO!
You are not obligated to say ‘Yes’ to everything. Even if it’s family. If you are overwhelmed with things to do, functions to attend, etc. Say No. You are not obligated to wear yourself thin. You are not obligated to attend everything. You are not obligated to spend money you don’t have. You are not obligated to go places that make you feel uncomfortable. You need to look out for you. And it is not selfish, even if someone tells you it is, it is looking out for you. It’s ok to say no.
IT’S OK TO LEAVE!
If you are in a situation that is making you uncomfortable, or overwhelmed, it is ok to leave that situation. I always have an escape plan. These days, it’s pretty much ‘I’m feeling overwhelmed, I’m leaving’. Again, people might try to make out like you are letting them down, but you are not. You are not being a nuisance, or a burden, you are leaving a potentially damaging situation to take care of yourself. It is necessary and important. You’re doing what you need to do to take care of yourself. It’s ok to leave.
SHUT DOWN THE FOOD/DIET POLICE!
Unfortunately, we live in a culture whose ultimate goal is thinness. We live in a culture that encourages everyone to be on some kind of diet. A wellness culture. Where ‘Clean Eating’ is some kind of thing to be held in high esteem. Sidebar, if I see one more post about how to enjoy the holidays without ‘falling off the wagon’ or ‘while still reaching weight loss goals’ I’m going to kick something. Some people feel like they have a right to make comment on what you look like, or how you’re eating. Newsflash, they absolutely DO NOT. No one has any right to question your food choices, or body choices. And it’s ok to tell people so. It can be ‘I’m really capable of making my own food decisions and I don’t need any outside input’ or ‘It’s my body, my rules.’ So, you enjoy holiday food however you want to enjoy it. I personally like to eat my weight in gingerbread stars, because they’re only available at this time of year and I bloody love them.
Not everyone will understand your choices. And they don’t have to, but it doesn’t give them the right to make you feel bad for your choice to take care, and love yourself. So don’t let them.